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kengrBothering strangers is not wise
Unlike so many others, I'm *not* surprised that a 10-year-old would do this.
There are far too many *adults* who seem to think they have a perfect right to ask nosy questions of strangers or coworkers.
Just because we work at the same company doesn't mean there's anything non-job-related I care to talk with you about...
Many years back a persistent jerk where I was working kept trying to engage me in conversation. I kept trying to ignore him (too many years of dealing with bullies in school meant that I was *not* going to tell him "Go away, I don't want to talk to you"
He finally resorted to setting the newspaper I was reading on fire.
No. I'm not kidding.
And when he got written up, my supervisor tried to lecture *me* about having let things get out of hand.
What *is* it about overly extroverted people anyway?
And about people who think they have to get to know you better?
I'm sure part of that last is that they are (incorrectly) assuming that you are much like them. And not realizing that *both* of us would be much happier if they *don't* know the details of my life they are asking about.
I'm thinking I need to come up with a "business card" that would explain the facts of life to them in a way that can't be used against me (other than as evidence that I'm "anti-social".
Something like:
I'm not answering your rude, prying and nosy questions for one or more of the following reasons:
1. you have no inherent right to the information. If I wanted you to know, I'd have volunteered the info.
2. The answer would make you uncomfortable.
3. the answer would make me uncomfortable.
4. The answer would reveal that I'm a member of a discriminated against minority that has no legal protections against discrimination.
5. The answer would involve my race, religion, politics, gender, gender identity, sexual orientation or other information that is legally protected under anti-discrimination laws.
6. It's none of your business.
Feel free to suggest other reasons.
Unlike so many others, I'm *not* surprised that a 10-year-old would do this.
There are far too many *adults* who seem to think they have a perfect right to ask nosy questions of strangers or coworkers.
Just because we work at the same company doesn't mean there's anything non-job-related I care to talk with you about...
Many years back a persistent jerk where I was working kept trying to engage me in conversation. I kept trying to ignore him (too many years of dealing with bullies in school meant that I was *not* going to tell him "Go away, I don't want to talk to you"
He finally resorted to setting the newspaper I was reading on fire.
No. I'm not kidding.
And when he got written up, my supervisor tried to lecture *me* about having let things get out of hand.
What *is* it about overly extroverted people anyway?
And about people who think they have to get to know you better?
I'm sure part of that last is that they are (incorrectly) assuming that you are much like them. And not realizing that *both* of us would be much happier if they *don't* know the details of my life they are asking about.
I'm thinking I need to come up with a "business card" that would explain the facts of life to them in a way that can't be used against me (other than as evidence that I'm "anti-social".
Something like:
I'm not answering your rude, prying and nosy questions for one or more of the following reasons:
1. you have no inherent right to the information. If I wanted you to know, I'd have volunteered the info.
2. The answer would make you uncomfortable.
3. the answer would make me uncomfortable.
4. The answer would reveal that I'm a member of a discriminated against minority that has no legal protections against discrimination.
5. The answer would involve my race, religion, politics, gender, gender identity, sexual orientation or other information that is legally protected under anti-discrimination laws.
6. It's none of your business.
Feel free to suggest other reasons.
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no subject
Date: 2004-10-07 12:59 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-10-07 01:12 pm (UTC)Yet it seems to be considered *normal* ask personal questions of coworkers and rude or "not a team player" to not freely discuss your private life with them.
The kid and the jerks are extreme examples, but... they are merely the far end of the curve. :-(
Gee, do you suppose I've got this book (or notebook or whatever) because I *want* to be interruppted?
Going postal is *so* tempting at times. But that'd just inconvenience me even more. <sigh>
no subject
Date: 2004-10-07 01:16 pm (UTC)That's why I take an MP3 player with me whenever I go out. Headphones might make me look rude, but at least I don't have the urge to kill people.
Frequently.
Much.
no subject
Date: 2004-10-07 01:14 pm (UTC)http://www.instantattitudes.com/shirts.html