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Jun. 7th, 2009
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The irony...
Jun. 7th, 2009 10:27 amThere's some major kerfluffling on several journals, some of which are on my f-list.
The post that started it all complained about folks bringing up "But I'm not like that" in discussions of things.
Thing is, the original poster's phrasing and language was accusatory and tarred all members of [group] with the same brush.
This has led to a lot of "oh, but I wasn't talking about *you*" responses to pissed off commentors.
Hint. If you have to use "I didn't mean you" or the equivalent, then you had a *major* fail in the way you phrased your initial post or comment. Regardless of your intentions, what you *said* wasn't what you meant.
And it also indicates that you aren't listening, just as much as you are accusing others of not listening.
ps. locking comments after stating that the folks who were commenting "aren't listening" shows that you don't *want* to listen. Or at least that you are unwilling to consider that things cut both ways.
The post that started it all complained about folks bringing up "But I'm not like that" in discussions of things.
Thing is, the original poster's phrasing and language was accusatory and tarred all members of [group] with the same brush.
This has led to a lot of "oh, but I wasn't talking about *you*" responses to pissed off commentors.
Hint. If you have to use "I didn't mean you" or the equivalent, then you had a *major* fail in the way you phrased your initial post or comment. Regardless of your intentions, what you *said* wasn't what you meant.
And it also indicates that you aren't listening, just as much as you are accusing others of not listening.
ps. locking comments after stating that the folks who were commenting "aren't listening" shows that you don't *want* to listen. Or at least that you are unwilling to consider that things cut both ways.