Hopeless

[kengr]

There are worse things than having a sucky life and dreaming of a "rescue"



Rejected


You want to know the reason why
I seem to shun the nighttime sky
I know you think it odd and strange
That such as I, who long for change
And dreams of starships outward flight
Should never watch the stars by night

One evening not so long ago,
Out on a road that few folks know
With only trees on either side
The engine of my old car died
And as I wondered what to do
One of my wildest dreams came true

One moment there was nothing there
The next, just hanging in mid-air
A ship, a thing of sound and light
Then I stepped out into the night
And as I stopped in awe to stare
I was engulfed in a blinding glare

When others have been far from kind
When they seemed petty, cruel, and blind
When being different made you ache
When lonely tears could fill a lake
Have you not dreamed, one night or day
A ship would carry you away?

So when I felt them touch my mind
I tried to leave my fears behind
I tried to make them see that I
Belonged with them, beyond our sky
And held within that beam of light
I prayed, yes, prayed my dream was right

They weighed me, sifted every thought
Each feeling, all that I'd been taught
Everything I thought I knew
And all I thought was false or true
My hopes and doubts, my shame and pride
Laid out before them, side by side

I felt, not heard, their weary sigh
And then they left the star-strewn sky
As suddenly as they had come
They left me, empty, cold and numb
My soul turned into ash and sand
Still holding out one yearning hand

[interlude]

So, now you know why every night
I ring myself with sound and light
And read or watch banal TV
Or drink 'til I can't think or see
Or lose my dreams in drug-filled sleep
Because when I see the stars, I weep


(Heather Alexander, from the album "Freedon, Flight & Fantasy")